Stranded (Cairo - Muscat - Kuala Lumpur - Sydney)

The lengths some people will go to secure Business Class flights, dear reader. Yes, sadly that is me. Today and tomorrow stretch before us like the waters of the Aswan Dam. Sorry, Lake Nasser. Endless. The photos are a random selection from the trip.

Near the Hatshepsut complex.

Spoiler alert, the title of today's post is Stranded by the original punk band, The Saints. You can work out what that means before reading on, dear reader. It was a long day. Actually, a long two days.

1. Luxor to Cairo (5 hours)

Breakfast was open at 5:30am, naturally. Bags were required in the corridor outside your room by 6:00am. As such the day continued as normal for a Travel Marvel cruise. We went to breakfast about 6:15am and our suitcases had already been spirited away. Breakfast was the usual affair. I was hoping someone might offer me a coffee. I haven't had that happen since day two, but alas, no coffee was proffered. The service is not, as Travel Marvel might suggest, premium.

We disembarked and boarded the buses one last time, after lifting the handles on our waiting suitcases. What if you have older luggage and there is no handle to raise? That's an issue. If there is a solution, I'm sure that it happened in Egypt first.

At the airport, we had to wait on the bus while all the luggage from the three buses was unloaded and moved into proximity of the entry doors of the airport. Then, like seagulls on a hot chip, we could all clamour over the pile and claim our bags. Mine, curiously remained elusive until the last.

The line up to get into the airport when you are moving 115 people en masse was ridiculous. But, as I have remarked, the finer details seem to escape those who organised the tour. The line was long because you can't enter the airport terminal without immediate security screening. Then you have the joy of queueing for your boarding pass. And that was a very long queue. All three of them.

Also near Hatshepsut.

We made it and actually were able to sit at the gate. After the obligatory second security check. We weren't seated long before we were told of a gate change and to line up immediately. They stopped scanning tickets at the boarding desk because the plane would never leave on time otherwise. In another exciting move, they had a mobile gate at the rear door of the aircraft. Bonus. We were in row 28, the third last and soon were seated.

The flight was uneventful until we arrived in Cairo. The travel company, Travel Marvel, wanted everyone to stay together. We were unsure about transiting to our hotel so were keen for advice. Basically we were told to wait and they would show us where the shuttles were for hotel transfer. So we waited for 30 minutes or so until all bags were off the carousel and instructions had been given for everyone. Except us.

Another question to a different agent - if you've been with us since the beginning, it was the guy who called Jayne "sweetheart". Yes he lived. His response was to wave us in the direction of the exit door. A great help. Anyway, we managed to find the exit door all on our own as well as the hotel shuttle sign and waited at Station 8 after I sent a message to the hotel. There was of course the usual spiv who wanted to know where we were going and offered to help, despite our protestations. Unhappily for him, the Novotel bus arrived just as he was telling us we were waiting at the wrong spot.

2. The Cairo Novotel Airport (10 hours)

The hotel upgraded us to a suite. Nice, since we'll be leaving at 10:00pm. We settled into our spacious two rooms and later wandered down for our complimentary drinks and then an early dinner. The hotel is in excellent proximity to the airport and the shuttle is a deal breaker, but the aircraft noise is significant, even on the third floor of four.

The sanctuary in Hatshepsut temple.

3. Cairo to Muscat, Oman (5 hours 30 minutes)

The shuttle left 10 minutes early, so it was fortunate we had checked out with plenty of time to spare before the scheduled 10:00pm departure. Cairo airport is a zoo. We battled the crowds outside before we continued the good fight inside. One security check down, we went to the desk to get our boarding passes and deposit our bags. That should have been the easy part. We were told to check our tickets and Jayne discovered a missing 's' from her middle name. This was conveyed to the attendant who had some difficulty understanding and printed the passes a number of times before asking for our electronic tickets.

I produced those but he was more interested in our seats on the flight from KL to Sydney. I have no idea why. Anyway, 20 minutes later we were on our way to passport control with a boarding pass that was missing an 's'. The lady checking the passports was lovely and politely told us that the paper we had been given with our boarding passes should have been completed. That would have been timely information downstairs at the Oman Air desk.

One more security check between us and freedom. The line was long and staggered forward sporadically. When we reached the front, the guy controlling the line called over another person and directed him to take us to the end security point. We were whisked a way and separated for a brief moment until I loaded all of the bags into the machine and the man responsible for taking us there asked for money. Sucked in tourist. I mean the conversion rate is laughable 3 Australian cents to the Egyptian pound so it cost $1.80. Not the point, however.

That would require a special room.

Reunited on the inside, we calculated that it had taken over an hour to get there. Straight to the lounge which was rather pedestrian but provided a place to sit until boarding at 12:15am. On board and bags stowed, we pushed back right on schedule. And then taxied around for a while. Apparently we had a medical emergency on board and an ambulance was called. A little over two hours later, we lifted off.

I gave us no chance of making the connecting flight at Muscat until we were about 90 minutes out. If Oman Air wanted us to make the connecting flight they could make it happen. As it turned out, they didn't care. We landed at 8:45am and our flight to KL was due to depart at 9:15am. It was possible, although our bags almost certainly would not be with us.

4. The Debacle (6 hours)

We disembarked quickly and made our way to 'transfers' to be finally greeted by an Oman Air employee with the news that our plane had already departed. It was 8:55am, 20 minutes before the scheduled lift off. We will rebook your flights and provide hotel accommodation, we were assured, just have a seat. So, we sat and waited for someone to come to us and, surprise, surprise, no-one came. Over we went again. This time we were re-ticketed: Muscat - Doha with Oman and then Doha - Sydney with Qatar. We were questioning the timeline and kept being reassured we would be home tonight. Do they even know where Australia is?

Kom Ombo altar.

A 70 minute flight to Doha with the loss of a time zone hour, a five hour lay over and then a 14 hour flight to Sydney was not going to get us home on November 11. Just to keep things confusing, the first flight was recorded in 24 hour time and the last leg in 12 hour. Anyway, we had our boarding passes and no luggage and a hotel room in the airport hotel with breakfast and lunch vouchers. All I really wanted was a drink.

The breakfast was woeful. In fact, so bad it defies description. The room was pleasant enough and it had a shower which was welcome. The other benefit was, we were still inside the airport and didn't need to check our suit cases, so egress should be relatively simple.

5. Muscat to Doha, Qatar (90 minutes)

And so it was. No security because we were inside the airport. We vacated our room because I didn't trust the guy who did the ticketing and told us we would be home tonight. Everyone scores a win every now and then and this was his. We were at the gate inside 10 minutes. Oh well, sit and wait and watch the people.

There were three unsupervised rug rats, more rat than rug. Running through the aisles releasing the tape and changing aisle configuration for the eventual boarding line up. Their parents did nothing. Any Oman Air staff acted likewise.

The stars of the show were three ladies in hijabs and a man. I assume parents and two grown daughters, who turned up and attempted to work out where the queue would begin and through which doors it would be processed. Their first attempt was to line up all their bags in the Business Class line blocking access for everyone, including staff. They gave that away and sat down for a while and then returned and lined up facing doors that clearly stated "No Entry". This created a flood of other gate lice who lined up behind them blocking access to both check-in lanes.

Life on the Nile.

Finally the gate opened at the desks, not the exit doors that everyone was facing. There was no announcement made, a staffer at the desk simply waved to them and like the blue tsunami that swept the US, they surged to the gates as one amorphous mass. We stood and tried to find the Business Class lane but it had been obliterated by the brats playing with the tape. 

I'd had enough by this time. Clearly their need to get on first was to dominate the overhead storage bins. We walked down the outside of the ever growing queue and asked the attendant at the desk if there was a Business lane. "You can come in" was the nonchalant reply. We looked back and then ducked under the barrier and forced our way in front of the mother and her three delinquent children. Gratifying.

The plane flight, although longer than stated at 90 minutes, was largely uneventful. I dozed often, woken only by my chair being kicked from behind. I tried to summon a curse, I had watched The Mummy on the last flight, but could only manage a quote from Klinger from MASH 4077, "may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits". Whatever, it adds local colour.

Horus with a cool hat. Ok, crown.

The kicker was one of the first out of her seat when we landed she removed one bag and placed it in the centre of the aisle, once again blocking the path for everyone else. When she moved further back down the aisle to collect her other two bags, some deft footwork from Jayne ensured her bag was isolated and we would be first off. I had the joy of kicking her bag out of my way.

6. Doha to Sydney (Lounge 4 hours 30 minutes, Flight 14 hours 30 minutes)

If you've not been to Doha and enjoyed the hospitality in their Business Lounge, you are missing out. Our plane parked at the farthest end of the terminal which necessitated a smooth transition through security, a long walk and a shuttle ride. The end point is nirvana, although it looked as though we might not get into the lounge. Several phone calls were made and hushed discussions were had before we were permitted entry into champagne heaven about 4:00pm local time. Our flight departs at 9:15pm, boarding at 8:30pm, that's a lot of champagne for people who have been deprived of it for 9 weeks.

Nice and quiet.

The lounge is divided into two sections, one for dinner and the other for drinks, snacks, light meals and quiet time. The dinner wasn't open when we arrived so we set up on the other side and enjoyed the champagne. The attendant came over for a chat and we talked about the problematic transit we were having. He must have felt sorry for us because he kept topping up our glasses until we said no more. There is only so much champagne you can drink on an empty stomach. I ordered a grilled sandwich which never arrived because we had to board the plane. The food service was much slower than the drink refills.

So many options.

We went to the gate as soon as it was open and breezed through security for what seemed like the 10th time that day. It was much less stressful than Egypt, shoes and watch stayed on. Downstairs to the next waiting room and it wasn't long before the call to load Zone 1 and Business Class.

As we walked towards the desk a man jumped in front of me. I'll be happy to get home where people are more polite and courteous. Anyway, I was vastly amused when we reached the desk and the airline representative told him to go and sit down as he was in Zone 4.

On board the A330, we had the luxurious Q suites with the magical door you can close to the rest of the world. There was of course a welcome champagne and then dinner was ordered, smoked salmon and caviar with blinis and cream cheese for a starter and a local chicken dish for the main washed down with a Chardonnay from Sonoma. Jayne was still feeling under the weather and opted for the soup and soft drink.

The flight itself was uneventful, well the sections where I was awake. I watched two movies, had dinner, listened to some music and crashed for a couple of hours. When I woke up we were three hours out of Sydney. Time for another movie and to order breakfast. And while the bakery selection was unremarkable, the freshly squeezed orange juice was a lovely surprise.

We arrived in Sydney a little before sunset with an excellent view of the harbour city and our own apartment block. The customs/passport process has been significantly improved since our trip last year. Although it seems somewhat archaic to still be filling out a paper form stating where we've been and acknowledging we are not breaking Australian quarantine laws.

Our bags arrived quickly. Given the issues we had with flights I wasn't sure that would happen. We had a brief discussion around Uber v Taxi and opted for a taxi because it was easier and there were a lot of people waiting in the Uber lines. Mistake. Ours, not theirs. A $95 fare is ludicrous. He took the long way home but because he asked for our specific address I assumed he was being directed by AI. That will be the last time we opt for a taxi home from the airport.

If you include the time spent at customs, waiting for bags and the taxi ride home we were in transit for over 48 hours. Jet lag here I come.

I am undecided if I will write a reflections on Egypt piece. Certainly I will be writing to Travel Marvel to question their concept of 'premium travel experience', but you won't get to read that.

Until next time.

Vigilante (Luxor - The Valley of the Kings)

Ah, holidays, dear reader, so relaxing, except for the early starts. Today we were up before 5:30am to visit the Valley of the Kings. The excuse, as usual, was heat and crowds. Early starts avoid both. Allegedly. I would have been more prepared for this if Travel Marvel had stated in the literature that early mornings are required. But they don't because they want to pretend its all sunshine and lollipops.

Anyway, we were on board the bus for a 6:45am departure. I can't remember how long the drive was, just that we had a brief stop outside the valley to pick up those of our group who opted for a 4:00am start and a ride in a hot-air balloon. Brave souls.

We picked them up at the Colossi of Memnon. The colossi are two huge statues of the Pharaoh Amenhotep III. Either he was a bit rough looking or the statues have not aged well. They were built around 1350BC and are 18 metres tall weighing 720 tonnes. There was a temple behind the statues at some point.

One of the Colossi.

Where the temple once stood.

The entry to the valley is the usual crowded, logistical nightmare, after you've dodged the vendors and their call of "one dollar". Your ticket requires scanning at a turnstile and then you have a choice of walking up to the valley or going by oversized golf buggy. In our case there was no choice, the buggy had been prepaid.

The 'pyramid' above the valley.

The valley entrance.

Your ticket also provides access to three of the tombs. Beyond that you had pay to extra and some of the main attractions were not included in our ticket. We had a quick introduction from our guide who recommended which tombs to visit based on varying criteria. Some were very steep and physically difficult to access. They were out, some were easy, some more colourful and so on. The problem of course was limited time. We had one hour and the queues for some of the tombs were quite long. And made longer by the French who would call their friends to join them, or some of the locals who just pushed in.

The valley is quite the marvel and houses upwards of 65 tombs. I'm not sure if the exact number is known. Those buried here are from the New Kingdom of Egypt and they opted for underground, hidden burial because of the raids on the pyramids.

The legend goes that workers were blindfolded and transported to dig the tombs. They worked for 20 days and then had 10 days off. The whole area is another feat of engineering because some of the tombs are very deep and have several chambers. Some were booby trapped, Raiders of the Lost Ark style. 

Anyway we visited three tombs, Ramses I, Ramses III and Ramses IV. Each one was very hot, almost airless, and humid. Some lines move quickly, others not so much depending on the number of morons taking selfies. And of course that nationality that insists every group member have a shot in front of the object of interest. 🙄

The pictures are below and don't require commentary except to say the colours were incredible.

Ramses I: his tomb was very deep. See the diagram in the last photo. It was the only one we entered that had a sarcophagus.

Ramses III

Ramses IV

After our tomb visits, we reversed the trip. Golf buggy, vendors and back on the bus to visit an alabaster workshop. There is no doubting the skill involved in what they do and probably silicosis as well, but it's not my style. They had a very slick presentation and then it was off to the gift shop. In my case, for the briefest period possible, then on to the bus.

After that we returned to the Valley of the Queens, so named, the other side of the valley where Queen/Pharaoh Hatshepsut had her temple constructed. It is a magnificent structure that dominates the valley and was obviously a one finger salute to the other pharaohs. Much of it was destroyed by her stepson Thutmose III when he became pharaoh.

It was very crowded so I didn't attempt to photograph the complex without people, even though I have removed some in various shots. The queue to get into the sanctuary was enormous. I dutifully lined up and got shoved and pushed as the line crept forward. Eventually the holy of holies was in sight. It was not a sight. The ceiling had been damaged and the sanctuary itself was roped off. You couldn't get close enough for a photo. Partially because one the temple guards had stationed himself next to the entry and offered to take photos for anyone who wanted them ... provided you paid him. So, no photos for me.

So, the Hatshepsut story, in brief. She married her brother and he had a son Thutmose III to one of his mistresses. Her husband/brother died and she conned the high priest into convincing the people she was the daughter of the god, Amun-Ra and could therefore be Pharaoh. In return she would marry him. She banished her 7 year old stepson to the army, however, they looked after him and he became a great warrior. She murdered the priest and Hatshepsut became a pharaoh. Later Thutmose III returned and took revenge on her, killing her and destroying or defacing her temple and any statues erected in her honour. Nice family. Christmas would have been a blast.

Which brings us to the title for today. A classic Taylor Swift revenge song, Vigilante Shit. I abbreviated the title because I didn't want to get blocked for breaching community standards. Again.

That was pretty much it for the day. We enjoyed the lounge on the ship and processed photos, blogged and chatted with the other passengers. The Australian ones. The ones not coughing up a lung, unmasked.

Dinner that night does not warrant reflection.

Tomorrow the grand depart begins. Early of course.

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Wishing Well (Aswan - Kom Ombo - Luxor)

Saturday

Well, dear reader, despite a full agenda of activities for the day, we have declared a rest day. Two 3:30am starts and full days have taken their toll. Besides we have been travelling for almost 2 months. 

A mosque near our mooring.

While we slumbered blissfully on, the intrepid were fronting up for breakfast by 6:30am. We did not make breakfast at all and spent the morning on the sundeck. It was surprising how many other people had declared a rest day. We were not alone.

The ship remained in port and coaches were despatched to Aswan Dam. While the body of water behind the wall is impressive, I've seen a few dams in my time. The Ord River and Lake Argyle come to mind. Not to diminish the importance of the Aswan High Dam. The wall is 3.8km long and 111m high, clearly a remarkable feat of engineering. The lake itself stretches over 500km all the way to Sudan. The water is used for irrigation and the production of electricity.

A passing felucca.

Next stop was the unfinished obelisk. It was intended to be the largest obelisk in the world. Had it been completed it would have stood 42 metres high and weighed around 1,200 tonnes. It was carved from one piece of granite during the reign of Queen Hatshepsut, 1473-1458 BC. However, a crack in the rock saw the project abandoned and it sits in the quarry where it was being carved.

The obelisk looking like a coffin.

The final destination for the day was the Philae Temple, perched on Agilkia Island in the Nile River. You can read about it here. The boat ride out there is apparently classified 'death defying' and it was the only time every guide carried a first aid kit. No injuries were recorded.

There was an optional activity in the afternoon, a High Tea at the "legendary" Old Cataract Hotel. Not familiar? Me neither. It is the hotel where Agatha Christie wrote Murder on the Nile. Buzz buzz, as Hamlet would say. The reviews of earlier teas at the hotel were met with less than complimentary comments. That trend continued with our crowd.

Dinner that night was on the sundeck. The wind got up early and brought a hasty end to the evening. We were back in bed by 9:00pm.

Sunday

Overnight the ship had sailed to Kom Ombo the site of another temple. Happily breakfast was at the more reasonable time of 7:00am, for a 9:00am walk to the temple through the mandatory alley of vendors.

Horus.

Kom Ombo is an unusual temple because it is dedicated to two gods. Sobek, the crocodile god of strength and fertility and Horus the falcon-headed god of kingship and protection. Two gods meant two of everything; entrances, halls, sanctuaries to honour both deities.

Another interesting fact is that President Nasser, (remember him?) he built the dam that threatened Abu Simbel and other temples, was partly responsible for the destruction of Kom Ombo because he used the stone blocks to build a shoe factory nearby. Not so interested in Egypt's storied past I guess.

Dual entrances.

The entrance to the temple.

The carvings are particularly detailed, some with bright colours. There is a depiction of surgical instruments used at that time. Of course, the Egyptians were first to use such implements and they don't differ widely from what is used in hospitals today. Interestingly our guide was happy to claim the 'first' here even though it was a Ptolemaic temple rendering it Roman. Double standards.

The surgical instruments.

Coloured vultures on the ceiling.

There were examples of how stone blocks were locked in place by wood. The wood, once inserted, was watered, causing it to expand and secure the blocks in place. According to our guide there were also depictions of sexual dysfunction. Who am I to argue?

In the middle of the picture. Really?

Wood lock.

One of the more quirky discoveries was a well. Nothing unusual in that, although the river is literally across the street if you were after water. This well measured the height of the Nile. A high water level meant good crops and high taxes, a low water level meant a poor season and reduced taxation.

The well.

Wishing Well is a rock classic from the 1970s by Free. I'll bet all the locals were wishing for a bumper season but a low level in the well.

There was also an Egyptian calendar. The only one in existence outside of the Louvre. Best not to mention it - they are not over it yet. The calendar has three seasons of four months and each week is 10 days long. There were three weeks in a month and at the end of the year there were five days dedicated to the gods, equalling 365 days.

The calendar, centre left.

There was a school group visiting at the same time which always provides some interest. The winner of interesting sight of the day goes to the young woman who had something that was the size and shape of a green cup cake. She was a scenery hog, like a selfie taker, and proceeded to hold up the cupcake and photograph it in the foreground of every picture. Weird.

Cleopatra VII

Next door to the temple complex was the mummified crocodile museum. Yes, you read that correctly, dear reader. The Egyptians mummified everything, animals, food, people, I don't know where it ends.

Wrapped like a Christmas present.

A baby mummified crocodile.

Picture them in a night at the museum.

Then it was back through the vendors to the ship. We sailed at 10:30am and had a very chilled afternoon. We secured vouchers for our next trip and I had a massage. All very civilised, relaxing until it was time for our port talk and the Farewell Dinner. The dinner is preceded by drinks, well cocktails specifically. They were lined up on the bar well before the 6:30pm commencement time. At 6:25pm the Brits on board charged the bar, some blocking access while they stood in place and handed drinks back to their friends. I kid you not. Clearly they like anything free. We may be 'convicts' but we have manners.

Also prior to dinner, we sailed through a lock that attracted a lot of our fellow passengers up on deck. This audience prompted a visitation by a group of locals who saw an opportunity to try to engage people by continuously calling out hello in the hope of eliciting a response. They were flogging carpets but achieved no sales while we were captive inside the lock.

Here are some sunset shots.

There was a trivia quiz after dinner, but given we had another early start, breakfast at 5:30am, we opted for bed.

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