Don't Lose Your Head (Zurich)

Yesterday's beautiful afternoon morphed into a blue sky, sunny day. After 10 hours of sleep, everything looked good, dear reader, except my reflection in the mirror. Breakfast was essential, prior to embarking on our 6 hour walking tour. Not noticing anything in our rambles the previous day, we opted for Delish, the café associated with the hotel.

An excellent espresso was followed by tomato and burrata, and cherry tomatoes and ham, prosciutto and salami. There were also fresh fruit and cereals and nuts and yoghurt. The croissant was passable. Suitably fleeced, sorry charged, for the day, I paid the almost $100 AUD and we walked to Central to meet our guide and fellow walkers.

Now is probably the time to talk about how expensive Zurich is ... it's really expensive. Scandinavia expensive. There, that's done. No, seriously, it is one of the most expensive cities in the world, certainly as far as food is concerned. A basic pinsa (pizza) is around $50 AUD, a schnitty is similar and specialty restaurant prices are just scary. If you're planning to visit, and it's worth it, don't convert prices to AUD, just live your life - but make sure you've saved up plenty of expendable cash.

A fountain ornament near the hotel. Great codpiece.

Anyway, I digress - we arrived at the appointed meeting spot on time. There were 14 of us in all, 1 younger guy from South Africa, 3 Australians and 10 Americans. Our guide Vasi was originally from Greece. Or so he said, but his ability to praise the Romans and not once say anything like, "but of course the Greeks did it first", had me wondering about his authenticity.

I picked the tour through TripAdvisor and it was then booked through Viator. Once confirmed it became Wow Zurich Tours. The Zurich Walking Tour with Cruise and Aerial Cable Car is a mouthful and a tad overstated. The 'cruise' part is actually a public transport ferry, not that there is anything wrong with that, and the pace required to complete some sections is unrealistic. Aside from that, you get to see and do all the basics and it is a great introduction to Zurich.

The Landesmuseum is a bit Harry Potter.

The meeting place was outside the Landesmuseum near Central Station. Vasi was quick to point out that one section of the tour required us to walk up a very steep hill to catch a bus. This was time critical. We had 7 minutes to get to the top to make the bus connection and if we were unable to fulfill this requirement, we should look for alternatives. Not a very positive start to the day as a number of the group began second guessing whether they would be able to fulfill the brief which incidentally had not been mentioned anywhere in the tour criteria. Yes, a moderate level of fitness was recommended, but given none of us knew what the gradient or distance of the "steep climb" would be, it was not realistic to make an assessment of the likelihood of being able to complete it in the requisite time.

That is a solid door.

The tour commenced uneventfully with a stop at the Zurich Central train station followed by a short walk to the entrance of the funicular that took us up to the campus of the premier University in Zurich, ETH, which apparently boasts many Nobel prize winners among its alumni, most notably, Albert Einstein. Apart from being an excellent vantage point to take some photos of the Altstadt precinct, it also provided the next anecdotal opportunity for our guide.

Here we heard about why Swiss chocolate reigns supreme - a mixture of:

- happy cows which provide the highest quality milk due to their personalised care, including daily massages from the farmers who own them. No, really.

- highest quality organically grown cocoa beans.

- traditional recipes and methods of production overseen by master chocolatiers, handed down through generations.

The view from the University entrance.

We also heard multiple theories questioning whether Einstein was the brains behind his theories or in fact, like many celebrated men (George Orwell, Picasso, me ...) his wife was the genius who never received any recognition due to the prevailing patriarchy. I suspect this will be an area of major academic study over the next 10 years or so. If you're interested, Wifedom by Anna Funder looks at the Orwell situation.

Fancy lights for a University.

Our walk was a rambling pace and stops were designed to impart a more in-depth knowledge of Switzerland, its people and culture. The next stop was on top of one of the many bunkers that are dotted around the country in case of attack. Apparently being neutral means you have no friends and need to protect yourself, like some Marvel hero, Crow for example (I watched it on the plane. Just don't). The bunkers are huge with dormitories, classrooms, cafeteria, all you need to survive, except the will to live because you're trapped underground with thousands of others. Vasi said that there is around 10% capacity in the bunkers for tourists and people from out of the city. A quick google check found his population stats to be rather rubbery, but I guess the concept is, room for all. I'm a sceptic.

This unassuming ramp is the bunker entrance.

On top of the bunker (see what I did there?) we also discussed military service and gun ownership. It's a complex story but basically every citizen has to do military service and everyone owns a state issued gun. The gun needs to be kept and maintained in a specific way and this is checked by a some nice police people or the army, whatever. If you breach the rules you are fined.

We walked parts of Altstadt with the group that we hadn't already traversed, although it was close to our hotel. Here the influence of Scandinavia was evident. In times when literacy was poor, paintings on the side of buildings allowed for navigation. Some buildings had their purpose carved into stone over the doorway. Something also prevalent in Roman times. As are the fountains that produce drinking water. Every fountain in the city has a separate water source and is safe to drink from or refill your water bottle.

A shoemaker?

A boot maker of quality as signified by the snake.

There are narrow laneways and wider streets throughout the old town. The narrow alleys were actually the sewer system back in the day. The toilets in the house were in rooms perched over the top of the lane or alley. Should you be using the laneway as a pedestrian thoroughfare you needed to move fast or carry a large umbrella, and be careful where you placed your feet.

Don't look up.

We next paused to admire a wall built in Roman times as Vasi waxed lyric about the Roman contribution to Switzerland back in the day. He was so enthusiastic I had to question his Greek origins. What Greek raves about the Roman empire without referencing that the Greeks did it first? And better. He said he was as scientist interested only in facts. I call bullshit.

The walk up to the park atop the wall was steep. This was the tester to see who would make the ascent later in the day. It was clear our group of 14 would not be that large at day's end. In the park, discussion turned to voting, women's rights and other issues. Voting in Switzerland is interesting. Anyone can create change provided certain criteria are met. Then there is an education process that generally takes years. Finally the vote for the change, yes or no, is like a referendum in Australia. If you agree with the concept there is no need to vote. It's left to the naysayers. There is an assumption that non attendance to vote is a vote for yes. Why waste your precious leisure time voting to show you support what is already being proposed?

Grossmünster Church with the salt & pepper shaker towers.

There are numerous churches worth visiting for the artwork. Fraumünster has several stunning stained glass installations by Marc Chagall as well as a 9 metre window by Giacometti. Chagall's work can also be found in a nearby café. Clearly culture abounds, but it was not always like this we were informed by our guide.

St Peter's boasts the largest clock face in Europe.

Women did not get to vote until 1970. There are numerous places across the city that are still divided along gender lines because of the previous incidence of domestic violence. Apparently a new, educated Switzerland was born sometime in the 1970s and has been getting progressively better ever since.

The history of Switzerland, like many European countries is long and chequered and is a story of occupation, overthrow, peace, rinse and repeat. Vasi constantly reiterated the theme that the Swiss are kind and welcoming people and then would follow a tale where the protagonist had his head removed. The guillotine was very popular and no doubt helped to keep the people well behaved. Points in case - the removal of all Muslims around the 1300s (I think) and a similar dislike of Jews some years later. The guillotine got a work out. Hence today's title, Don't Lose Your Head by Queen from 1986. Here it is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecrheD1eYYU.

A former hero who lost his head.

After a brief (and imho unnecessary stop for lunch) the tour continued. We caught a public ferry down the lake to disembark and climb the stairway to heaven, well the bus, in 7 minutes. Or else the guillotine. The path was very steep but made more problematic by the constant reminder that we would be left behind if we did not get to the top in the required time frame. We made it and then stood around for three minutes waiting for the bus. As I predicted, our numbers had dwindled. Three of our group were missing out on one the main reasons for going on the tour: the cable car to the top of the mountain for the panoramic views of Zurich and its surrounds.

The cable car is able to accommodate 30 people. My mind drifted back to the crowded elevators in HK. Thankfully we didn't cram that many people in today. The ride to the top takes about 10 minutes and then if you're an energetic local you go hiking along the trails. If not you walk the ten minutes to the café for food, beer and a rest. The view is, of course, spectacular. It looks down on the lake and out over the urban expanse of Zurich which was much larger than I thought. In the other direction are the 'baby' Alps. Not so visible today through the camera lens due to the haze.

The view from the top.

We have experienced the best weather. Temperatures in the mid 20s, blue skies with some light clouds. Not the weather the locals are used to nor what they want. They want cloud to keep the temperature down. Climate change is having a serious impact and the glaciers are melting at a faster rate than ever. The impact of this means the alps are moving apart. One current study suggests they are moving into Italy and the border between the two countries may need to be renegotiated.

Our ride home.

Waiting for the cable car to return, Vasi was answering questions around health care, crime, whatever. He explained that health care was subsidised by the government and your healthy lifestyle options will be also be subsided. Unhealthy people, as in obese, receive nothing but smoking incurs no penalty. Again, I call bullshit. Every second person here smokes. It is disgusting and pervasive. It is near impossible to enjoy a meal or a beer outdoors and not be suffocated by cigarette smoke. Vasi said the link between smoking and ill health is not 100% proven. That just demonstrates he is not the 'scientist' he says he is. There are very few studies that can claim a 100% causal link, if any.

The 'baby' Alps in the haze.

The cable car trip down saw us onto a train to head back to Central where we bid the remainder of our group farewell. The other Aussie then joined us for beers in Altstadt before he headed back out of town to his hotel and we retired to freshen up before dinner.

Another big day, dear reader, that saw me asleep by 8:30pm.

Until tomorrow.